Sunday, 26 September 2010

How To Make Your Wife Giggle Uncontrollably

There are several ways of doing this, but here's a new one I discovered yesterday.

1) Go shopping, a few hours earlier than usual.

2) Notice that the professional kitchenware shop that is nearly always closed, and whose windows you normally gaze longingly into, is actually open.

3) Spend half an hour lusting after all the bits of kit you want, but only buy a slightly exotic Cook's Hat.

4) Do the rest of the shopping.

5) Rush home and head straight for the bathroom.

6) Unwrap your new hat. Put it on, and admire yourself in the mirror.

7) Wander nonchalantly into the kitchen, put away the groceries, and wait for your wife to notice your cute new headgear.

8) Try not to get upset as she laughs her leg off for half an hour.

Iluvit. And I'm sure if I put my mind to it, I could balance a stack of pizza bases on it.


Macthomson said...

Hats are, in my experience, a matrimonial hazard. In the days before my wife became my ex I visited with her a respected Munich hatter since I felt then (already) that I had passed the age for baseball caps. I wanted something more... mature.

Each titfer I tried resulted in hoots.

The hatter smirked unforgivably.

To this day my headgear consists of an assortment of baseball caps, some of which carry swirling Arabic lettering.

Now nobody laughs.

BTW: I was anticipating a priestly white toque! Spared that, weren't we?

nzm said...

The duck is very unkind - I think that you look very suave, Keefie!

Istanbilly said...

This also made my wife giggle uncontrolably Keefieboy!

Personally I think you need a brush, a palette with some oily blobs of paint on it, a canvas and an easel.

But then, your cooking is definitely a work of art!

Cheers mate


Keefieboy said...

Oh no! I'd just stopped, and now Mrs I's started me off again!

Keefieboy said...

Er... I just did that on Keefie's machine, but with my ID, & it's come up as him! Bloomin' Macs......... (Gonna be Keefie again now, so nuh.... ).

Keefieboy said...

It's (this is Keefie now, not the Duck) a funny thing, but since we came to Madrid I've been more and more inclined to wear hats. Mainly for practical reasons - keeping off the rain / sun, but also because I think they're a bit stylish.

The cooking hat is also practical - it soaks up the sweat and stops random hairs dropping into the pies. Before getting this outrageous beret thing, I would wear a Madrid World Cup baseball cap, whose rigid peak would frequently collide with the kitchen cupboards and the cooker hood.

leftbanker said...

The hat makes you look more like a Basque separatist than a chef. I would accessorize it with a wine bag and maybe an Athletic de Bilbao camiseta.

Jayne said...

I have to admit the hat is a tad 'arty' in appearance keefie, but you do look rather swish!

Rachel said...

hahahaha you are so funny. I love this post and your blog.